Eddie, The Eater, Cullen
by lollercakes
Summary: Bella's the new girl in Forks who catches the attention of notorious mobster Edward Cullen. They have more in common than it seems at first, leading to a food-filled romp and romance. Co-written with mmmaaadworld and missedstoplight from Livejournal.


Another day. Another boring day trying to keep up this charade. Walking into my biology class, I wonder if anyone here actually buys that Emilio is my buddy, and not a bodyguard hired by my father. Sitting here waiting for Mr. Molena to start his shit on cell division, I'm running through tonight's agenda. Hire new henchmen. Buy that fucking lime green suit I've had my eye on for weeks. Oh yeah, and make sure to fix the races for tonight.

I haven't always been a gangster drug lord. Ever since my father died, he left this whole shitfest for me to clean up. Before that, I was just a normal kid. A guy who loved food and his family and would do anything for either a good meal or a relative. Now, at 17, I'm forced to pretend that I give a shit about high school, when hundreds of people would take a bullet for me and the millions that I have at my disposal. The only thing that gives me pleasure involves myself, a table, and a thick and juicy... steak. I can't help it; probably some childhood trauma that gave me this weird ass foodkink that I can't seem to get the fuck over. Nothing helps. Not meaningless sex with the Forks sluts, not the coke that I deliver to the greater Washington area, nothing can fulfill my cravings.

Or so I thought.

Just as I was practicing my 'threatening' face for the deal tonight, my attention was caught by a delicious, intoxicating scent. It was everything that is good in the world. Hickory sticks, freesias, cornflakes and the entire fucking KFC value menu: Honey BBQ Sandwich, Popcorn Chicken Snack Box, original Recipe Sandwich, Apple Turnovers and buttermilk biscuits all rolled into one. To the other students, I bet I looked like Toucan Sam... following my fucking nose. It led me up the front of the class, behind a short brown haired girl who was talking to Molena. I took a deep whiff and almost jizzed in my pants right there.

I leaned back on my stool, my elbows braced against the lab counter behind me. Her scent was delicious, enticing. I needed more. Emilio Estevez, my tuff love, Mighty Ducks loving bodyguard, leaned in at that moment and piqued my curiosity beyond the scent of the woman.

"Eddie boyo, that's Bella Swan. She's our top seller. Got a hybrid of sorts, works mostly with cornflakes and other foods. She's got a great ass." Emilio whispered seductively in my ear. I grinned a crooked shiteating grin as Molena directed her to the seat next to mine. I leaned forward and straightened my fucking tie. Her KFC scent enveloped me as the air around us grew moist. She mixed my two favourite things. Food and fucking cocaine. She was my dream woman, and I didn't even fucking know her. All I wanted at this fucking moment was a bowl of cornflakes and her bacon sandwich on my man sausage. I looked around the room to sense the atmosphere. Mike Newton, a notorious coke fiend leaned toward her as she sauntered down the class aisle, nibbling on an apple pie in front of him. He had at least 10 on him or around his desk leftover from lunch. It was no doubt he was going to develop Type 2 Diabetes at some point in his life.

Bella approached him and zeroed in on the apple pies. She was wearing a subtly skanky tank top that pushed her breasts up and out and a short-barely there skirt. She grinned and leaned into Mike, his eyes zoning in on her tits.

"These apple pies look absolutely succulent." She whispered, proceeding to grab two from his desk. Swiveling around to me, she threw them on our shared desk leaving Newton gawking and slack-jawed. I stared at her, literally jizzing in my pants this time as she sat on the stool to my right. I was in deep, glazing the inside of my boxers for her, and she hadn't even fucking opened her mouth for me yet

"Hey," she smiled for me, but I didn't even notice as I was still checking out her tits; imagining them bouncing up and down in my head. I had to have her over for a jump on my trampoline one day. I still heard her voice talking, but I didn't hear anything except something similar to what Charlie Brown hears when adults in his world talk. When I heard a lull, I knew I was expected to answer, but instead I hushed her and prompted her to pay attention to Mr. Molena and the task at hand.

I couldn't concentrate on the instructions, however. Staring at the profile of her body, er, face, I just got more and more excited. The way she was devouring the apple pies she simply took from Newton was so sexy to me. I liked a girl who knew how to eat and she knew how to eat so good.

I quickly looked away and remembered who I was. I was a drug lord, and she was one of my many dealers. I had already introduced her into a world of scum even though she illuminated such a pure, white light. She was good, and I knew it. I had to protect her somehow, and keep her away from my world. I also knew deep down inside that I couldn't live with myself if I knew she got off'd one day in a in a bad deal. I couldn't let that happen to someone like her. I had just met her, but I knew I loved her.

Suddenly, the bell rang and we said our goodbyes. Only the tin pie pans were left over from the succulent desserts. I felt a ping in my pants. I had to rub one out so bad. Or, eat. I decided to myself that masturbation would be too exhausting at this point and that it was better to head over to the diner to fulfill my needs. A great steak dinner would calm my raging boner. I had to tuck my dick. No doubt about that. Under the belt, or down the boxer leg? It wasn't too humid out today, so down the boxer leg sounded fine. I hastily hopped into my Volvo heading to the local hot spot of Forks.

I parked in a spot right in front of the diner. Through the glass panes, I saw something that made my stomach sink, and feel hungrier than ever. Bella. Bella was a waitress at the diner. It made no sense, but I suppose it had a reason. I guess so the old man didn't get suspicious of her constant cash flow from the deals she made for me. She somehow saw me through the tinted glass of my silver sex on wheels and waved. There was no way I couldn't go inside without having to deal with an inquisition the next day in Biology. I walked inside, hoping for a booth to more easily conceal my now hard manhood. The combination of Bella and food drove me crazy.

I sat as Emilio lingered at the booth behind me having followed in from his Jeep. Bella clicked her heels over to my booth, a smile plastered on her face.

"Hey sexy, what are you doing? Is everything okay, you seemed distant in Biology?" I looked her up and down, imagining my knife in between her hams. My cock twitched at the sound of her silky voice, flashes of her eating my meat crowding out my consciousness. There was no place for right and wrong: only P in the V, and maybe after I could B an L on her T's. I knew I had to have her right there and then on the diner table, but I knew that was also really unhygienic. I motioned over to the bathroom doors. Her eyes were alight with a passion I only felt when left alone with a room of perfectly cooked bacon. She wanted my man meat just as much as I wanted to give it to her.

I got up from the booth as I tipped my cap to Emilio _like this_ and passed through the bathroom doors, Bella skipped her way in under my arm as I held the door for her. Emilio nodded, putting his hands together in a slow clap beginning his trademark chant, "Ducks. Ducks. Ducks! Ducks! DUCKS!" The rest of the diner joined in as the door swung shut behind me. "Ducks fly together holmes, TOGETHER!"

I'm sure the whole restaurant overheard me screaming about her glorious meat curtains from behind the closed doors.


End file.
